So drunk its hurt
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
