You're my little dorito
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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