May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
This show inspires me to have sex in space
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize
