In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Randomize
