He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Randomize
