you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
