sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Randomize
