The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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