I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Such a big mess for such a small penis
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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