he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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