Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
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