some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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