I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
