Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Randomize
