He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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