I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I need to wash the frat house off of me
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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