I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
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