i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Randomize
