when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Sacagawea was the original milf.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
