wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
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