I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
