im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
