literally had 100 drinks last night.
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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