My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
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