dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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