shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
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