So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Randomize
