just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
