please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
So many bounce houses so little time
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
We need to feng shui this bitch.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
