i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Randomize
