Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
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