Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Randomize
