Duck Duck Cougar?
On Saturday, I sharted on my roommates dog while trying to make it smell my farts. Today I got security clearance to work for one of the most respected and secretive govt agencies in the US
It's the American dream
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize