I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
I just forgot I was standing up.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
