its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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