and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
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