No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Randomize
