you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
