matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Randomize
