She is in my trunk
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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