If that was your dad, he is hot
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
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