I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
