i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
