In all seriousness though I just found out the dog pissed in my bed it'd be nice to crash somewhere other than my couch while my piss soaked bedding is in the washer
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Randomize
