Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
