i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
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