Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize