when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Holy shit dude........stairs
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