I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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