dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I have feelings that need drinking.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
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