I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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