Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
Randomize
